IELTS Writing Task 2 essay, two model answers for Band 5 and Band 9 with explanations

super achievers
May 24
4 min read

Topic: Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Band 9 sample answer

In every society, developing well-rounded and responsible citizens is essential. While some argue that parents should be the primary source of social education, others believe that schools play a more important role in this process. Both perspectives have merit and deserve consideration.

On one hand, parents are a child’s first teachers. From birth, children observe and mimic their parents’ behavior. They learn manners, respect, discipline, and basic social values within the home environment. Since parents spend a significant amount of time with their children during their formative years, they can deeply influence their character and behavior. Moreover, lessons taught by parents are often tailored to a child’s unique personality, making them more impactful.

On the other hand, schools provide a structured setting where children interact with peers from diverse backgrounds. This interaction teaches them teamwork, empathy, and tolerance—key components of being a good member of society. Schools also have trained educators who implement moral and civic education through various subjects and activities. In this controlled environment, students learn rules, responsibilities, and the importance of contributing to their community.

In my opinion, both parents and schools share the responsibility of shaping children into good citizens. Parents lay the foundation of moral values, while schools reinforce and expand these lessons through social interaction and formal education. A balanced contribution from both sides ensures that children grow up with a strong sense of responsibility, empathy, and civic duty.

In conclusion, while parents provide early and personalized guidance, schools offer essential social learning through broader experiences. Combining both influences is the most effective way to raise socially responsible individuals.

(Word count: 278)

a Band 5 level IELTS Writing Task 2 essay

Some people say that children should learn from parents how to become good members of society. Others think that school is better place to learn this. In this essay, I will talk about both views and give my opinion.

First, parents are first people who stay with children. They teach them how to behave, respect others, and speak politely. Children watch parents and copy their actions. For example, if parents are kind and helpful, children also learn to be kind. So parents can teach many good things at home.

However, schools are also important. Children meet many other children at school and learn to work together. Teachers teach them about rules, discipline, and how to help others. There are also subjects like moral education which help children learn what is right and wrong. School is a place where they learn to be part of a big group.

In my opinion, both are important. Parents teach children when they are small, and school continues the learning when they grow up. If both parents and school do their jobs, the child will become a good person in the society.

To conclude, parents and school both help children learn how to be good people. They must work together to teach values and good behaviour.

(Word count: 240)

comparison between the two IELTS Writing Task 2 responses (Band 9-style and Band 5-style), followed by an explanation of which is better and why:

🔍 Comparison: Band 9 vs Band 5 Essay

Criteria	Band 9 Essay	Band 5 Essay
Task Response	Fully addresses the task with clear discussion of both views and a strong opinion.	Addresses the task partially; ideas are underdeveloped and not well-supported.
Coherence & Cohesion	Paragraphs are well-structured with smooth transitions and logical flow.	Basic structure; some repetition and awkward transitions between ideas.
Lexical Resource	Rich vocabulary (e.g., well-rounded, civic duty, reinforce) is used precisely.	Limited vocabulary, often repetitive (e.g., good people, teach).
Grammatical Range & Accuracy	Wide range of sentence structures with high accuracy.	Basic grammar with noticeable errors (e.g., parents are first people, better place).
Ideas & Examples	Ideas are well-developed with relevant examples and explanation.	Ideas are simple and lack depth; examples are not explained clearly.
Word Count	278 (within the required range).	240 (below minimum requirement of 250).

✅ Which is better and why?

The Band 9 essay is clearly better because it:

Meets all IELTS criteria at a high level: It fully addresses the task, has a clear argument, and uses a range of vocabulary and grammar accurately.
Develops ideas well with detailed explanation and logical progression.
Is easier to follow due to proper paragraphing and linking words like on the other hand, in my opinion, and in conclusion.
Has stronger examples that support the points made, such as the influence of early parenting and structured social learning in schools.

In contrast, the Band 5 essay:

Has limited vocabulary and grammar, with noticeable errors that affect clarity.
Fails to reach the minimum word count, which results in a penalty.
Presents underdeveloped ideas, making the argument appear weak or too simple for IELTS standards.